Tips&Advice Can Herpes Be Transmitted Through Kissing?
October 28, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
Kissing one’s partner on the mouth is one of the basic acts of intimacy that most individuals take for granted. However, for some individuals, having a sexually transmitted disease can limit the number of intimate acts they can perform with a partner without infecting them with the disease. It is important for an individual to understand how genital herpes is transmitted in order for them to know the boundaries that they cannot cross. Genital herpes is caused by the presence of the HSV virus in the human body. There are two types of this virus: HSV 1 and HSV 2. Each type has different symptoms and frequency of outbreaks. However, mouth to mouth kissing is highly unlikely to transmit the virus to one’s partner.

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The virus is primarily transmitted through the exchange of infected bodily fluids. It is possible for a person to transmit the disease through oral sex; however, this is unlikely unless the affected individual is currently experiencing an outbreak. Similarly, the act of “dry humping”, even with skin to skin contact, is unlikely to spread the disease in the absence of an outbreak. Even during dry humping though, the presence of genital secretions through the vagina or the penis can still be present. Therefore, it is ideal for a couple to use a form of protection, like a condom, to be on the safe side. Other forms of suppressive therapy, like the taking of daily, oral medications, can further reduce the chances one has of transmitting the disease to a partner.
If an individual, or their partner, is infected with the disease, it is imperative that the couple educate themselves about the risks and other factors that accompany genital herpes. The best source of information comes directly from a general health care provider. When sexual or intimate acts are performed with care and caution, a couple can enjoy a healthy, normal sexual lifestyle. If the couple in question genuinely loves one another, the disease will not become the defining characteristic of their relationship. However, if an individual is infected with the disease, he or she should be open and honest with their partner about the facts of their condition.
Quick Click Links
1.Books on Coping with Herpes Amazon.com
2. Alternative Herpes Treatments on Amazon.com
Tips&Advice:Why You Should Tell A Potential Partner You Have Herpes
October 28, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
It is important for an individual with genital herpes to not allow the disease to become the defining factor of their lives or their identity. However, it is highly important for an individual with the disease to inform their partner of their condition before the two become physically intimate. Even if a person is not suffering from an outbreak, the disease can still be transmitted from skin to skin contact. Although it does provide an additional hurdle to cross when one is looking for a life partner, there are numerous individuals who have successfully passed this hurdle and are living in normal and healthy relationships, including sexually active ones. Yet, your life is not over simply because you have contracted a sexually transmitted disease.

PositiveSingles.com – the best, most trusted and largest anonymous STD dating site!
Returning to the dating scene after you have discovered you have contracted genital herpes can bring a myriad of fears and questions. If you tell a person you have the disease, will they still want to date you? Will your partner believe that you are a “bad” person? What will they tell other people about me? Will I ever be able to have a normal sex life again? These emotions are certainly understandable. You can still date. You can still fall in love. You can even still get married and have children! However, it is important to be open and honest with a potential partner, because a long lasting relationship should not be built upon a foundation of lies or deception.
Your potential dates down the road will be concerned about the fact that you have a sexually transmitted disease. Although suppressive medications can keep the disease in check, there is not a cure available for it. However, when you tell a partner about your affliction, their reaction will allow you to gauge which ones are serious about having a relationship with you in the future. Simply having genital herpes does not change the essence of who you are as a person. There will be individuals who will exit the relationship because they are unable to cope with your disease. You should anticipate this reaction in some instances, but it should not be allowed to affect your self esteem. Being open and honest with someone you care about your STD will demonstrate your concern for their well being, and it will allow you to find the man or woman who will look past the disease to see you for who you truly are.
Quick Click Links
1.Books on Coping with Herpes Amazon.com
2. Alternative Herpes Treatments on Amazon.com
Tips & Advice:How To React When Your Partner Tells You They Have Herpes
October 28, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
Let’s say that you have met a truly wonderful man or woman, and you are interested in taking the relationship to “the next level”. However, before the relationship progresses, your potential partner breaks the news that he or she has genital herpes. Your initial reaction may be one of shock, mingled with a little bit of repulsion and curiosity. Most individuals are familiar with the basic definition of what genital herpes is, and it is true that there are certain social stigmas attached to a person who does have the disease. While there can be a myriad of emotions to deal with on the topic, first and foremost, you should be appreciative that your romantic interest is being forthcoming and honest with you. He or she is demonstrating concern for your well being.

PositiveSingles.com – the best, most trusted and largest anonymous STD dating site!
After your initial reaction to the news, there are several things that you should consider. First, can you see yourself having a long term relationship with this person despite their disease? Having genital herpes does not change the individual that you are beginning to like or fall in love with. Secondly, you should consider the fact that with daily doses of suppressive medication the chances of passing herpes on to one’s partner can decrease by as much as 75%. The use of condoms during sexual activity further decreases this risk. While there will always be a potential chance of catching the disease, safe sexual practices can allow a couple to enjoy an almost normal sex life.
Finally, the longer amount of time that an individual has herpes, the less frequently their outbreaks occur. Over extended periods of time, the human body develops an almost “immunity” to the virus, which reduces the amount of outbreaks that an individual has. However, the human body is unable to rid itself of the virus completely. Do not hesitate to ask your significant other questions about the disease and their specific condition. He or she has most likely developed a somewhat extensive knowledge of the topic, and they should be willing to answer your questions openly and honestly. You should not allow the genital herpes to prevent you from finding love and happiness with one person. However, if you feel that the herpes is not something that you can look past, then you need to inform your partner quickly so that he or she will be free to find happiness with another individual.
Quick Click Links
1.Books on Coping with Herpes Amazon.com
2. Alternative Herpes Treatments on Amazon.com
Tips & Advice: Dating Men With General Herpes
October 28, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
Unfortunately, genital herpes affects men in the United States five times more than it does for women. While there are a plethora of treatment options for the disease, it is considered to be incurable. Due to the negative social stigmas that are attached to the disease, many men believe that they will be unable to find a partner in life. Even if a man with the disease is married, it can become a challenge to prevent spreading disease to his unaffected partner. The disease is primarily spread from oral to genital and genital to genital contact. However, if the individual is responsible and careful about treating their disease, it is possible for them to enjoy an almost normal lifestyle, including dating.

PositiveSingles.com – the best, most trusted and largest anonymous STD dating site!
For a man who has recently contracted the disease, the dating scene may seem almost impossible to cope with. The truth is that there will be women who will not be interested in dating such a man simply because he has the disease. The fear of contracting the disease is too great with most individuals. While this truth can be somewhat unsettling, a man must learn how to deal with the rejection in a healthy manner. One course of action that he should not choose is to hide the disease from a potential partner. A dating relationship that has the potential to become something more serious should not be built upon lies and deception. His partner should be informed of the potential risk that he or she will be undertaking.
Engaging in safe sexual practices greatly reduces the chances that an individual has of contracting the disease. However, abstinence is the only sure fire method of not spreading the disease. The disease can be a mixed blessing in disguise. It allows a man to “weed out” the women who are not serious about being in a committed relationship. If a woman truly loves a man, she will be able to look past his disease, although the mechanics of the relationship may be altered somewhat from what is considered “normal”. Genital herpes can serve as a hurdle in a man’s dating relationships; however, many individuals have successfully passed this hurdle and live in happy, sexually fulfilling relationships.
Quick Click Links
1.Books on Coping with Herpes Amazon.com
2. Alternative Herpes Treatments on Amazon.com
Depressed & Single With Herpes? Join a Herpes Dating Site Today!
April 23, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
I hate to sound like a broken record when I say this, but you truly are not alone in your struggle with herpes. There are millions of single adults suffering in silence just like yourself. Your herpes diagnosis probably felt like the end of the world. You felt like know one else would want you. Perhaps you aren’t ready to come out of your herpes shell and start mingling with singles who do not have it, so join a herpes dating website today and meet people who are just like you!
Dating With Herpes – How to Overcome Rejection
January 4, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
The likelihood of rejection is very much real when you have genital herpes and are interested in dating someone that does not have herpes. The social taboos associated with the virus are too many to count. Herpes is demonized and the large majority of the population, even those with the virus – are mostly misinformed about what it is and how it is contracted.
Coping With Herpes Diagnosis Depression, Dating, Relationships & Myths Dispelled
January 4, 2010 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
A herpes diagnosis can send even the most well balanced individual into an emotional tailspin of depression. It is an incurable disease and although it isn’t deadly, and considered a mere annoyance to the medical community – carries a taboo throughout all of society. Chances are you feel incredibly lonely, isolated, dirty – and angry. If you are single, you’re also concerned about your chances of having a healthy and fulfilling love life as well. Depression is a very natural reaction to have when you suffer from the herpes virus – but now is the time to educate yourself and learn what it is that you can do to overcome these feelings and live a normal life.
Top Herpes Myths Dispelled:
1. I can’t have children: This is absolutely 100% FALSE. The herpes simplex virus will not prevent you from having children, nor can you pass on the disease to your children in utero or during the conception process. HSV type 1 (oral) and type 2 (genital) are contracted via skin to skin contact. This is why many in the medical community consider the virus to be more of a dermatological disease, even though it is often passed through sexual contact. You will contract herpes through seminal fluid, vaginal fluid or blood. If you are a man, you can still reproduce – and if you are a woman, you can still conceive. It is important that your doctor knows your status ahead of time because most often, a woman with genital herpes will be given a Cesarean section (c-section) instead of having a vaginal birth to reduce the chances of the child coming into contact with the virus in the vaginal canal.
2. I can’t donate blood: FALSE! The inability to donate blood is another common misconception associated with the herpes virus. Let me state once again – the herpes simplex virus is not a blood-based virus. When you contract herpes, oral or genital, it “lives” within the nervous system of the body. If you have oral – it generally rests in the base of the neck, when you have genital – it rests in the base of your spine. When dormant, it just kind of lays there – harmless, but when active – it travels via the nervous system to it’s outbreak location. According to the Red Cross and all medical studies, donating blood when you have HSV is perfectly safe. They ask that you avoid doing so when having your initial outbreak or even subsequent recurrent outbreaks.
3. I can no longer work around or hang around kids: FALSE! The guilt and depression associated with the virus tends to cause some sufferers to withdraw from the world. They feel that they are the most disgusting person around and go through great lengths to avoid interacting with people, especially children. Once again – stop beating yourself up! The chances of casually transmitting the virus to children are very slim. Did you know that an estimated 75% of the U.S. population has some form of HSV – for the large majority it is type 1, oral herpes. Don’t allow your diagnosis to cause you to stop living your best life possible. Now the virus is passed from skin to skin contact, so common sense hygiene practices are in order when dealing with the public. Keep your hands clean, avoid touching any sores during outbreaks, and keep your hands away from your mouth and eyes.
4. My sex life is over: Herpes will undoubtedly change your sex life, but it is far from over. You will definitely need to be careful, more responsible – and less spontaneous…but you can have a full happy sex life. You aren’t limited to the type of sex you have either, you are just limited in the ability to be “carefree”. This can be a good thing though – so don’t fret.
5. No one will want a serious relationship with me: FALSE! I won’t try to paint a rosy picture of easy dating and acceptance by everyone you come across. Relationships aren’t easy to begin with, and that is even more true when you have an incurable disease of any sort.There are some people who will reject you without even giving you the benefit of the doubt. Others may give you a chance, only to later decide that they don’t want to take that risk. You may also decide that you rather only date other people with herpes, if that is the case – there are thousands and thousands of people waiting to meet you. There a several great online dating sites for people with the herpes virus – including PositiveSingles.com and MPWH.net
To meet other singles with oral and genital herpes – register today at PositiveSingles.com – you’ll be happy that you did!
Stuck in a Dead End Relationship Because of Herpes?
December 10, 2009 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
There is nothing more frustrating than feeling stuck in a dead end relationship. Perhaps you’re in it for the kids, or maybe you’re sticking around because you have grown comfortable with your partner.Those are the typical reasons for most people, but you – well, you aren’t “most people”. Your situation is entirely different. You are stuck in your dead in relationship because you and your partner both have herpes.
You may have given it to them, or they may have given it to you – how you contracted it is really besides the point, you want out of the relationship but are deathly afraid of what the single life will have in store for you. Having herpes is difficult enough, but having herpes and being in a relationship made you feel safe – now having the virus and the thought of being single is depressing.
First know that you are not alone. You’ve likely heard all of the statistics regarding the number of people with either HSV-1 or HSV-2, and you’ve likely heard the spiel about how it isn’t “that serious” – but to you it is, and exposing yourself to a mean unforgiving public isn’t a task you’re up for at the moment.
Here are a few things for you to think about:
1. Never bargain away your happiness: Your ultimate happiness is not a bargaining chip to be traded away for something less valuable. Remember the saying – “when you settle for less, you usually get less than you settled for”. Or as one r&b songstress sung ” the things that we accept, will be the things that we regret”. Make no mistake about it, if you stay in your current relationship simply because you are afraid to venture outside of your comfort zone, you are making a grave mistake. Your feelings will soon turn to bitterness, resentment and hatred. Who wants to be in a relationship that’s full of those types of negative and life sucking emotions?
2. Herpes does not define you: At the risk of sounding like a broken record, allow us to remind you one more time that you are NOT alone. There are millions of people with oral and genital herpes, and hundreds of thousands of single people – looking for love and happiness just like you are. If you are full of guilt and shame, you will attract people who feed on and exploit that. If you walk in acceptance, happiness and comfort- people will reciprocate that as well.
3. You have options: Despite what others have said, regardless of how herpes always seems to be the butt of the joke (no pun intended) – you do have options. There are thousands of couples where one person in the relationship has herpes, and the other does not. Not only that – but there are online dating sites dedicated to helping people with HSV find successful relationships.
Staying in a relationship at the risk of compromising your happiness and complete fulfilment is never a good idea. Don’t be afraid to step out on your own and explore your options. Positive Singles, the #1 herpes dating site – is a really great place to start!
What Can We Learn from Celebrities with Herpes?
December 10, 2009 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
What do Michael Vick, Robin Williams and Liza Minnelli all have in common? Well, besides being popular celebrities – they also have all been the center of lawsuits for allegedly infecting sexual partners, or in the case of Liza Minnelli – failing to disclose her status, with herpes.
Michael Vick is likely the most popular of the three. In the early 2000′s he was sued by an unnamed young lady for failing to disclose his genital herpes diagnosis and ultimately transmitting the virus to her. According to the reports, Vick was fully aware of his status and even used the moniker “Ron Mexico” as his alias when he received his testing for the disease.
Liza Minnelli’s ex-husband, David Gest used the fact that she had not told him of her HSV-2 status until after they were married as a way to have their prenuptial agreement dismissed. And in 1986, Robin Williams was sued for over six million dollars by an ex-girlfriend who claimed that he infected her with herpes.
Not all celebrities take this route with their status, in fact Ann Heche has been pretty forthcoming about the fact that she has genital herpes – in her 2001 autobiography, she revealed that she has had it since her childhood when she contracted it from her father who molested her. Billy Idol has also candidly admitted to having it as well.
The list of rumored celebs with it is even longer, ranging from Derek Jeter, Brad Pitt and Bill Clinton to Jessica Alba, Janet Jackson, Brittany spears and Paris Hilton.
At the end of the day, sexual health and medical history is an extremely private and sensitive matter that should never be broadcast to the world – and only shared with those you trust and intend to have an intimate relationship with. To an extent, celebrities have forfeited a certain amount of that privacy in exchange for wealth and power. But the question still remains – what can we learn from celebrities with herpes?
1. Importance of disclosure: The stigma of oral and genital herpes carries much shame and guilt. Most people would sooner cut off the tips of a finger than tell the entire world that they have the disease. However when you are worth hundreds of millions, embarrassment, shame and guilt can be put on the back-burner in hopes of a six or seven figure out of court settlement. Although Michael Vick did eventually settle out of court, his dirty little secret was now out of the bag – and it obviously hasn’t had a negative impact on his ability to have relationships. Now the chances of you being sued by someone for giving them herpes may be a lot slimmer, but don’t take that for granted. Knowingly putting someone else at risk is extremely irresponsible and can lead to a lot of hurt and pain. So while you may not face a court case, your status may be publicized and your reputation damaged. Exposing yourself may be an incredibly scary thing to do, but taking away someone else’s options is even scarier. You were once in their shoes – so remember that.
2. Herpes doesn’t define you: Is Brad Pitt any less hot because he’s rumored to have herpes? Is Billy Idol any less talented because he has admitted to it? Is Robin Williams less funny? Or Michael Vick less talented? The fact that you have herpes (in any form) doesn’t define you, nor does it make you any less great, fabulous, beautiful, smart, or attractive. People will treat you in the same way you treat yourself. If you are full of guilt and shame, you will invite people into your life who will exploit that and use you. If you come to terms with your disease, accept that this is something you have to deal with, and seek to educate others – then you will attract people who are comfortable, accepting and supportive.
Now certainly some of these things are easier said than done, but that does not negate your personal responsibility in this matter. Treat others with the same respect and consideration that you would want to be treated with.
If you are still uncomfortable with the idea of outing yourself – try registering at some of the more popular herpes dating sites, including Positive Singles.
Dating With Herpes: Do I need to take Suppressive Therapy?
December 9, 2009 by Natalia & Savannah
Filed under Relationships and Herpes
When you come to terms with your herpes diagnosis, you’ll really need to make a decision about what treatment options you will utilize. If you are single, and intend to date people without herpes – this is doubly important.
As you know, there is no cure to the herpes simplex virus. Although the virus is not deadly or particularly dangerous – it is still incurable. Disclosing your status to any potential sexual partner is a must. There are many within the herpes community who do not feel comfortable dating outside of the “group” – however when dating people who do not have herpes, there are a few things that you can and should do to protect them.
1. Be honest about your outbreaks: Nothing ruins spontaneity like an annoying herpes outbreak! You should consider yourself highly contagious when you are experiencing an outbreak, so it is best to refrain from intercourse during these times.
2. Pay attention to your prodrome symptoms: Part of being honest about your outbreaks involves you knowing when they actually occur. Due to the fact that they aren’t always visible or noticeable – keep track of the symptoms you have immediately before an active outbreak. In other words, are your glands and lymph nodes tender? Do you have any body aches? Abnormal itching? A tingling sensation near your outbreak sites? Knowing your symptoms will give you a better idea of when you may be shedding.
3. Eat healthy: Many people with herpes report increase in outbreaks when they eat certain foods. It is widely known that things like peanuts, caffeine, and even wine can cause the dormant virus to make it’s way to the surface. If certain foods are your triggers, try to avoid them or find alternatives.
4. Take a form of suppressive therapy: We’re sure you’ve seen the cheesy Valtrex commercials – where one person in the couple has herpes, and the other person has not – and it’s been that way for years! As cheesy as they may be, there is an element in truth behind the commercial and the product itself. Studies show that when taken regularly, Valtrex drastically reduces the chances of passing the virus on to your partner. If you are dating outside of the herpes community, you should make it a point to take your meds on a daily basis as prescribed.
5. Always use protection: It is important to note that the herpes simplex virus can be passed on even when you use condoms. Since the primary form of transmission is through skin to skin contact, if you have surface level shedding in a place not covered by a condom – you are still contagious. It is also important to remind you that both genital and oral herpes can be transmitted during oral sex. With those things said, using condoms is still a “must”. Condoms combined with suppressive therapy reduce the transmission rate to less than 2-3%
Now these five tips are just a few of the ways to make dating those without herpes less stressful, the other alternative is to explore your dating options amongst the herpes community. Although the disease is still taboo and demonized, there is a rather large online dating community out there just waiting to meet you! Positive Singles is one of the premiere herpes dating sites.




